Summertime, swing it.

Hello World, 

I've never been amazing at dressing myself and I'm still on that self discovery of finding my style.
With inspiration of Emma Watson, Alexa Chung and Taylor Swift, I like to think I would be there one day.

Fashion is a huge part of me, my battle with clothes for myself is continuous. Dress for other people and I'm fine. Dress myself and it becomes war.


Rose

The Beach.

Hello World,

It's the sea air that makes you forget,

It's the sound of waves that makes you escape, 

It's the fastness of nothingness into the horizon, 

that makes you feel incredibly small.

Today a friend and I went to the beach (the benefits of gaining a day off during the week), it's not really a fantastic beach and we do have some lovely horror stories we have experienced about this beach. But it is a beach we have been going to for a long time and just being there, with our memories and creating new ones as well.

For example; today we played crazy golf, for my first ever time. I pretty much sucked at it. 

Rose.

Dreams and Interpretations.

Hello World,

In so many ways this post could be personal or it could be creative. Either way, even I am intrigued as to how I will end this.

Dreams, dreaming has become a normal thing for me again. I am guessing it is because I am not as tired as I used to be, or it could be that I am having a lot of repressed emotions, that only my dreams can solve. The unfortunate thing is, I haven't had a clue about them, until a friend of mine (whom I talk to a lot about my dreams), mentioned that my dreams are very similar, even though they are completely different.

In this post; I am giving you a little sneaky preview of my mind during the night time.

The first one that I remember is:
There's this place, far away and deep into a valley. The buildings have become weathered and worn away. Some still hold their grace. I entered this place through the gates, along with my husband*, my guard, and my son*. We enter one of the buildings that has been spared from years of abandonment and the weather. It turns out the house still belonged to an elderly couple, who was servants to the royal family that lived here once upon a time. They welcomed us into their home, for they knew who I was. They have dreamed of my return for many years, and here I am to reclaim my crown. 
The settlement around the valley is filled with hay and livestock that has been going on for years. The elderly couple has warned me that other people have resorted to living in the wilderness and as much as they have tried, they have yet to be rid of them, as it was stated in some law. Upon exiting the house with my group, my son runs ahead and then falters. There in the field are the humans who holds weapons and have many slaughtered cattle around them. My son, he runs back and then they charge. Murder in their mind, murdering the queen, so they can continue to live where they are. They wanted to murder me. All I could do was run towards a castle, a castle that was in my mind but could not be seen within the place. It wasn't until I saw my son murdered and a knife flew to me, that stopped mid air in front of my face, did I see my castle. Then, I woke up.
** I have no husband or son and I consider it strange to dream about having such things, as it is no desire of mine.
Another one;
Prison, I was captured and held in prison. They took me into a room and hosed me down, dressed my in plain clothing and sent me to another room. There I met a group of others, male and female. Each look upon their faces, dark, dark and evil. It's hard to describe the uneasiness I felt from being faced with them, they did nothing to harm me, for we had to work together. They take us to another room, a room filled with paintings and of fine dinning. Dinning tables and chairs are surrounded, we sit and wait for food. We should have been alert, why did we expect to be served. The beast came and we stood united. We all attempted to fight. I then woke up.
Last one and most recent one;
Welcome to another live show, a show like no other. A show that actually had no plot, when I finally think about it. I was standing in every so often, speak during the intervals while the main people got ready for the next set. The next part a wrestling match, a brutal and bloody thing to watch and towards the end, people came in. People in mask and in black cloaks, why think of dementors in Harry Potter, but more tamed. In front of the audience and my eyes, they cut the throats of the wrestlers and point to me.
Terror, I remember feeling the terror of the audience course through me, but I held no terror, only the need to guide them out of the building. Guide them away from the people who wanted me and would kill anyone who was with me. Through the mountains, the fields and then to the ocean where on the other side is a beautiful city. In that city is my one, the one I need. Still being chased by my captors, I have gathered the audience and it's my dream, there's a boat. We sail across into the city and become lost from my captors and from the one. 

My friend tells me, I seem to dream a lot about being chased, to be killed. So, like anybody who wants to know why I am dreaming this, I resort to Google. Which tells me, when someone is dreaming about being chased and they are running away from the chaser, they are running away from their own fears. In order to stop yourself from running away, you need to question yourself? What are you running away from? What are you scared off? You need to face your chaser and deal with it.

This is some internal emotion right? I'm dreaming, how can I make myself turn around and say "no! You're not chasing me anymore," and then destroy them with my magic powers. I think I need to dig deeper, what am I afraid of? There is many things I am afraid of. I think these dreams are about my fears of living. My dreams and who I want to be. 
It will be all very well for me to turn to this part of the post now and say, I am going to change. The thing is, I'm still terrified and all I can do is type "I'm going to try. Try my very hardest".
Even if the dream interpretations are right, I need to start working around and stop myself from being chased and make my dreams, my dreams.


Rose.

Past.

Hello World,

Hello Past, with your crooked smile. 

I've been wanting to reach you, but the only good part of you.

I think we will chase for quite awhile, 

I know you will win,

It's best to just give up, 

There are just things I am not ready to let go,

Or I chase you, 

Knowing they are already lost.

Rose
Lately I have been searching my memory and keep thinking about the past.
This is not a good thing.